MURDER MAYHEM AND MADNESS. MY MEMOIRS.

Haven’t posted lately and certainly haven’t posted daily like I said I would in earlier posts.

If any of you are on my Facebook page (which I encourage you to do) I posted what Paul McCartney makes in royalties every single day (something like $USD600.000) and my asking $30 from SOCAN in November. I thought it was amusing.

For the past couple of years I have been working on my memoirs. I was approached to do them by a friend of mine in Melbourne who is a digital marketing specialist. For months I would send him audio files via the net for the proposed project, but then I get interested in other things such as a Canada Council for the Arts grant to write and record new music.

That didn’t work out but I will try again. The fatal flaw in my application was I forced Erica Veltmeyer to write the application. All things considering she made a valiant attempt but it caused her to have a meltdown in the process. Next time that I apply to Canada Council I will write the application myself and have a more focused agenda.

So its back to my memoirs. It being almost Christmas and 2023 is on our doorstep, it’s probably time to get some goals. Consistent daily writing seems to be the best thing. I have the resources, that being time, an iPad with Magic Keyboard (my aged Toshiba laptop isn’t much fun to write on), and a diverse and colourful life of experiential knowledge to draw on.

Also I believe writing the memoirs will be therapeutic.I would like to take an almost scientific approach to probing my own mind and why the way I am. Or  put another way, to find myself.

Also I wish to document myself and my family. Because sadly to say my family and all they represented has been erased. It’s like something that would happen in Stalins Russia.

I now have a variety of posts, and I am thankful for the views I have gotten. But my posts are a mere preamble to the main event of this blog, which is to write the first draft of my memoirs. Or at least that the plan.

Back in 2002 or perhaps 2003 I was in Toronto visiting Catherine Macguire, who sometimes gave me vocal training and I affectionately dubbed Piano Lady. While I was waiting for her to arrive I told her boyfriend about recent aspects of my life, to which he commented: “ Your memoirs would read like Mickey Spillane meets Carl Gustav Jung!”

If I write and publish my memoirs it certainly wont be for the money. And supposedly the average person who publishes a book can expect to sell about 500 copies.

I haven’t really said anything about this title “MURDER MAYHEM MADNESS” but expect me to explore the underlining subject matter in depth.

THE LAST POGO JUMPS AGAIN BABIES RUN MY WORLD NARDWAUR CARDBOARD BRAINS

 

Here I found “Babies Run My World” by Cardboard Brains as discussed in an earlier post. (As I write I’m listening to “A Song for Europe” by Roxy Music off, I believe the Stranded album.)

The last post I entitled “The Life of Ermie Scub (Dogsitting)” because I was indeed dog-sitting at The Veltmeyer Estate for ten days. I live the quiet life now, thankfully free of the drama that permeated my life. Especially the years 2002-2012.

The dog in question Emmy-Lou, a rescue pup from Texas. She gives me solace, something to love and care for in my new found modest peace. Here my friends, is a pic of Emmy Lou:

Just sayin’.

And above a better pic of The Last Pogo (BOMB)(1979).

In September 2002 GODS GAMBLING and LSD premiered at the Isabel Theatre at The Toronto International Festival of Festivals. I appear as myself with the Director, my friend Peter Mettler.

GODS GAMBLING and LSD subsequently won a GENIE award for BEST DOCUMENTARY. It’s won other awards internationally but I haven’t really kept track in all the confusion.

In Director Colin Brunton’s revisitation of the film “The Last Pogo” , “The Last Pogo Jumps Again”, NARDWAUR fills in for me because I was unavailable in the extreme.

The last gig I did with what was called by myself, CARDBOARD BRAINS was in April 2000, and just before the premiere of GODS GAMBLING and LSD I did KILLER RATS in Bulgaria with Ron Perlman. Which was a very cool experience. I play Hans, the Rat Exterminator. Got to hang and party with Ron (Hellboy, Sons of Anarchy, etcetera) Perlman.

Whoever views this blog glance at the post CURRICULUM VITAE that’s on only part of the puzzle. My background far transcends my years as leader,singer songwriter of the “punk “ band Cardboard Brains. 

I haven’t included my filmography, some of which appears on IMDB.com

THE LIFE OF ERMIE SCUB! (Dog sitting)

 

Here we have on YouTube my 1980 LP THE LIFE OF ERMIE SCUB in its entirety. I had intended to post BABIES RUN MY WORLD (1978) released 1979 on BOMB RECORDS: THE LAST POGO (Live at The Horseshoe Tavern, Toronto), but I couldn’t find it on YouTube. It’s somewhere in that cyber abyss of the likes of Harry Styles and Adelle. Or Adel or whatever.

I’ll find the LAST POGO Babies Run My World, or perhaps someone will find it for me, eventually, and I’ll post it. It’s a lo-fi recording but I feel confident in saying its one of the best tracks on this release, at least Paul McGrath of The Toronto GLOBE AND MAIL thought so. To paraphrase Paul McGrath’s article in said newspaper: “CARDBOARD BRAINS should sign for respectable money on prominent dotted lines and stand heads held high in global new wave predominance”.

A bold statement but I’m actually not making it up. The comment was great for our egos but always left me kind of embarrassed and uncomfortable, but all these years I might as well own it. I surmise other bands hated us for this kind of press we got but so is the game.

Which makes me think about Liz Worth and her apparently fine book about the Toronto punk scene “TREAT ME LIKE DIRT”. I haven’t read it yet but someday I surely will. According to Michael Panontin  of Canuckistan Music said something to the effect that myself and CARDBOARD BRAINS were curiously excised from her book, with the minor exception of a mention in a discography.

Another point about The Last Pogo version of “BABIES RUN MY WORLD” is that it was number one on campus radio stations in Canada. Someone from BOMB RECORDS phoned to tell me that.

I entitled this post “The Life of Ermie Scub” because of many of you dear readers know not what an Ermie Scub is. Ermie Scub is simply a name I invented for no particular reason to entitle my solo departure from my Cardboard Brains. As Cardboard Brains guitarmeister Vince Carlucci aptly said in 1980 when I left: “Paul is the only person I know who quit his own band.”

So that is why this domain is https://www.ermiescub.com.

I’m currently dog sitting Emmy-Lou at The Veltmeyer estate until her master Erica returns. Scuba for not posting regularly but self-discipline is a commodity I find hard to muster. Think I’ll buy some new clothes today for a fresh incarnation of JPY. I’ll post again when I return.

Oh and if you listen to The Life of Ermie Scub I strongly suggest good headphones. Someone on the internet insisted : “MUST BE PLAYED LOUD”. And please put in context this was written and recorded in 1980 so aspects are dated. Laurie Mercer of ALLMUSIC did a nice review a while back in which I’ll share.

NARDWAUR THE EVAPORATORS CARDBOARD BRAINS

 

Around the early years of the season of my discontent I noticed a strange phenomena on the internet. Something called a Nardwaur and apparently a band called THE EVAPORATORS had somewhat of a hit song called CARDBOARD BRAINS. By about 2005 I had put the pieces together to learn that NARDWAUR, The Human Serviette, was a MuchMusic VeeJay and legendary interviewer had a band called The Evaporators and a song entitled CARDBOARD BRAINS a homage of sorts to my band.

In 2005 ( I’m Guessing the year, it was a blur) I was living on top of The Rex Hotel at Queen Street West across from the practice space we shared with John McLeod (Johnny and the G-Rays), down the street from The Horseshoe. It just so happened that I read in NOW magazine that the Evaporators were playing The Horseshoe that night, so I swallowed my beer and headed down to introduce myself to NARDWAUR.

He said in a gentlemanly fashion: “ It’s an honour!”  Took a publicity photo with himself, yours truly and the bass player from THE EVAPORATORS. He gave me a copy of RIPPLE ROCK, The Evaporaors CD at the time. When I got home and opened it, I found it had loads of great liner notes on myself and CARDBOARD BRAINS. Which I would like to share WITH YOU NOW:

“ I would love to see Cardboard Brains play live. If I may turn the reins at this point to my friend Marc Coulavin who will now subject you to a short history of the real Cardboard Brains (not The Evaporators song!):

“ Deadly Alien Foam. That’s what you could be reading about here. It was one of the names the band considered before settling on “CARDBOARD BRAINS”. An interesting and humorously self-deprecatory name, compared to the more obnoxiously provocative ones chosen by their fellow musicians on the Toronto punk rock scene. Things like Arson, The Battered Wives, the Cads, the Curse, The Fits, the Forgotten rebels, The Poles, The Rage, Rex Chainbelt (after a cement mixer part!) The Sharks, Slander, Swindled, Teenage Head, Tyranna, The Ugly, The Viletones and ZRO4.

It’s also a clue they were slightly different from the rest. Although their first  EP, a 7” bearing the legend “Cardboard Brains 1977” contains four blasts of primitive and raw punk rock, there are definitely shades of quirkiness. Both in the lyrics as on the presumably sarcastic “I Want to Be A Yank”, and the music. Certainly in the vocals. 

“Their on-stage presentation was also out of the ordinary. Eschewing the ripped jeans and T-shirts aesthetic of his contemporaries, singer John Paul young favoured dressing up in costumes. On at least one occasion, he removed his clothes to reveal a Riddler-like turquoise body suit covered in question marks. Young also integrated his training as a thespian into their shows, displaying behaviour qualified as “pretty bizarre” by a third year performance studies student (who should know!), at Ther 1982 Sheridan College gig. A first year business student called them “danceable but weird.” Not unlike The Evaporators in some ways!

In December 1978, Cardboard Brains appeared at The Last Pogo, a two day event at the Horseshoe tavern marking the end of that establishments “New Wave” booking policy. Parts of these shows, including numbers by Cardboard Brains, were committed to celluloid and vinyl. the more adventurous bent of the group reveals itself further on these contributions, as well as their second outing, a four song 12” EP released in 1979. this is perhaps due to the departure of original bassist Paul Oconnel and drummer Richard Miller, who were replaced by John Thomas and Dave Richardson on The Last Pogo recordings, and by Patrick Gregory and Mickel Keena on the EP.

In 1980, Mr. Young went solo and produced a rather depressing concept LP entitled The Life Of Ermie Scub, The group reunited in 1981, with Young and guitarist Vincent Carlucci as the only original remaining members. This resulted in a live album recorded at new wave club The Edgar, issued the following year in a very limited edition of 441 numbered and autographed copies, by then their music had evolved into fully-fledged prog punk, years before anyone came up with a name for it…but that was also the bands swan song. Since then they have reunited for a few club dates, one of these being a retrospective  compilation CD.

Young went into acting and composing for the movies. Carlucci formed Station Twang with Carl Tafel (a later Cardboard Brains alumnus, whose previous vehicle had been Terraced Garden). Patrick Gregory  became a member of The Woods are Full of Cuckoos and the Lawn.

The Cardboard Brains version of The Monkees’ “Stepping Stone” off their first EP, appeared on the all-Canadian Killed By Death Vol. 26 in the mid-nineties, raising their profile accordingly. Someone anonymously issued a facsimile of that EP in the last year or so. Now you can look forward to the pleasure of a song called “Deadly Alien Foam” on your next Evaporators platter! Cheers!and now back to your host Nardwaur…Thanks Nardmeister!”

So those are the liner notes from Ripple Rock by The Evaporators featuring Nardwaur The Human Serviette.

SLOTH

 

Sloth.There is much  for me to tell but  most of  the time  I don’t feel like doing anything. I would like to post daily because the search engines like to sniff the keywords. This Apple Magic Keyboard is pretty neat  but the space bar the is malfunctioning in that I must hit the shift key in between words.

Which is much more than you need to know. Previous posts have been brief and vague because I am just getting used to blogging and the limitations of my technology. Topics such as Curriculum Vitae have been pretty vacant, I haven’t even included my filmography. Days go by. Canada Day July 1,2022 went by and I wanted to post. My birthday July 16, 2022 (66). Eventually I posted something but not much.

Eventually I want to explore the Cardboard Brains history with an analysis of the various releases, including my solo LP “The Life of Ermie Scub “. I want to address my filmography including Metal Messiah (1978), The Gate (1986), Johnny Mnemonic (1996), Killer Rats (2001) and Gods, Gambling and LSD (2003).

It’s painful but I will detail how and why I effectively disappeared for twenty years and why Nardwaur appears in The Last Pogo Jumps Again (2006).

THE ELECTRO BEAT CARDBOARD BRAINS

 

Pauline Groen, John Paul Young and Vincent Carlucci the incarnation of Cardboard Brains that opened for The Stranglers. No drummer just one of the first LinnDrums.

LIVING INSIDE MY HEAD

 And here is the song off the ever popular Cardboard Brains White EP (1977).

A NEW ANALYSIS Of A CURRENT CRISIS

 

Cardboard Brains poster from 1978.

WELCOME TO THE MINISTRY OF PROPAGANDA

Propaganda is typically misleading or biased in nature. However in this blog I will relate the world in my eyes, and I will post only what I know or hold to be true. As Tony Montana wisely stated in Scarface (1983), “I always tell the truth, even when I lie.”.

So far this blog has been experimental. I am becoming accustomed to the nuances of Blogger, and the bots and crawlers that sniff keywords have discovered it. It’s now recognisable to Google, Bing, Duck Duck Go search engines as ermiescub.com and I am glad. I still have some way to go.

I will try to post everyday in the future. I must overcome the lethargy  and inertia that has enveloped me for years and exact some discipline on my mind and body.

Further expect this blog to become more structured. I will write less with an attitude of just blurting out anything and I will write more with a view to actually making some kind of point.

Maybe this blog will be my ticket to ride and save me from the powerful discontent I feel from essentially doing nothing. They say there’s things happening here in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada but the Canadian JPY has yet to burrow into some kind of scene. Yes there’s films that happen in Halifax but I have yet to go through the drill of compiling a new résumé, getting a headshots, and getting a new agent. The idea of putting together a voice reel seems overwhelming although I should have one, should have all of these things. It’s not like I’m new at the game.

And I’m embarrassed of the fact that I am not really a member of ACTRA (Alliance of Canadian Cinema, Television and Radio Artists) currently. I went off the grid between and went into seclusion after the release of Peter Mettler’s Gods, Gambling and LSD (2002). For some reason I was foolish  enough to stop paying my dues and I became under suspension. I have years of residual cheques coming to me. It’s still not an overwhelming amount of cash money to speak of but still its reflective how I was so in seclusion I didn’t even collect my cheques. Still haven’t. That and an agent are on my never get around to it TO DO list. I think I ceased being a card carrying member of ACTRA sometime after 2005. Things between 2002 and 2012 (my tribulation period)are a blur. I don’t relish of telling agents I was, and am not, but will be a member of ACTRA. But eventually I will bite the bullet. Perhaps they could simply follow the blog and I wont wind up explaining the almost unexplainable, not to mention unbelievable story of how and why I essentially disappeared from traditional view.

And I’m not doing music. At days away from 66 I’m on a meagrely  pension and I live a modest existence.

From 2018 to 2020 I had the position of School Crossing Guard, on the payroll of the Halifax Regional Police and working for the Halifax Regional Municipality (HRM). I liked it actually. Not the attention and accolades I was used to but I was protecting children (and adults), people relied on me and received some extra cash. It gave me a routine and that something I never had. At one point. during those two years I actually felt happy normal and content. Sort of a rush all things considered.

But now my body feels so wracked and ruined I feel I can’t even do that. Neither do I want to. I burned out on that methinks.

No haven’t been doing much and I am desperately seeking answers and solutions.

And so I blog.

SCREAMERS and CARDBOARD BRAINS at The Horseshoe Tavern, October 31, 1978

 I remember being on the set of CINOFRENIC and having to go to open for The Screamers later that night. Cathryn Gilday of the Toronto Globe and Mail gave us a very nice review entitled “Cardboard Brains Just Fine”.

CINOFRENIC (1978)

 This is in response to a comment by unknown. I “star” in CINOFRENIC, as “Paul”. To the best of my knowledge Cardboard Brains does not perform in the film but Mike Nightmare and The Ugly does. I think The B-Girls also perform, and I can’t remember who else does. I probably wasn’t there that day.

IMDB probably has more info on CINOFRENIC. Vince Carlucci would remember if Cardboard Brains performed in the film. I’m occasionally asked about it and if a copy is available. Again I don’t know. Eventually one will surface. Apparently it’s got some good footage of bands like The Ugly. I will always remember seeing Mike Nightmare spinning his mic around and singing: “Your not living in the real world!”. RIP Mike Nightmare. Thanks for the comment. JPY . And no, I don’t perform any music in the film. However we did in The Gate (1986). More about that shortly.

Mine damer og Herrer, kommer Metal Messias til dere!

 Well yesterday’s post got seven views so far. At least somebody is paying attention. So far I’ve been using my 10.5 inch seventh generation iPad and Magic Keyboard. It’s a great little device and as I may have stated earlier it baptised me into the Apple ecosystem. But it’s sort of like typing on a toy because its so puny. I suppose I have to bite the bullet and get a 24 inch M1 iMac if I am to get anywhere in life.

Apple should sponsor me.

I was ripped off for $CDN180.00 today. But when you’ve lost as much money as I have you don’t sweat the small stuff. Purchased www.johnpaulyoung.org. The goal is to get a Wordpress website up and get back in the game.

It’s hard to believe that I have been in Halifax Nova Scotia for coming up ten years. Living in relative obscurity. It’s been nice and peaceful in comparison to the last ten bullshit years circa 2002-2012 that I spent in my hometown of Toronto, Ontario. I spend 50 per cent of my time at my bachelor pad and the rest  of my time with the true love of my life, a little dog named Emmy Lou.

(Okay about a week has gone by folks and I begin again.)

 I believe the title of this post is in Norwegian, and comes from the sub-titles to a frame from the 1978 film Metal Messiah. It was the first feature film by my friend Director Tibor Takacs. Tibor produced the Cardboard brains 1977 White Ep and the 1979 Cardboard Brains Black EP. Tibor also directed one of the last films that I have done Killer Rats with Ron Perlman.

I am  going to stop deleting things. The original post from this blog I deleted, along with a post about being in the 1992 LA riot. I can’t remember if the original post detailed my 2002 kidnapping on Yorkville Avenue or not. So I must re-write and re-post.

BLACK IS MY HEART

 This  morning started with my usual Breakfast of Champions: two Vyvanse, a pickled egg and a cup of coffee. The only thing missing is a high octane energy drink, but that shall surely come. Whatever gets you through the night or day I say.

I didn’t write anything  that day.Thought a lot about it. Curled  up in a ball, lied and bed and confined myself to my thoughts as is my usual fashion. Today breakfast du jour was a Java energy drink, two Vyvanse and a half pack of smokes. I’m going to go on a health kick.

I’m 65 years old now. I came to Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada ten years ago as healthy as a horse, still a man reminiscent of the stud of his youth. In 2013 I was diagnosed with prostate cancer which thankfully is in remission as well as diabetes. However, my mobility is impaired and I have a small basketball for a belly with sticks for arms and legs. I reckon I look like a pregnant spider.

Of course this blog is in its infancy and will go through growing pains. I intend to post regularly so as to feed keywords to all the web crawlers and bots out there and get more views. I really get off on seeing the stats from Google on how many views I get and from which country. And as I write I have one follower besides myself, and for this I am grateful.

Twenty years ago when the internet was just becoming a thing, I had www.johnpaulyoung.com and would check my fan mail first thing in the morning and corresponding with those in France, Austria, Japan etcetera. 

But outrageous fortune played a hand in my life and I effectively disappeared for twenty years.

I didn’t tell anyone but I actually felt the compulsion to snuff myself the past few weeks.

But that would never happen rest assured dear readers.

FUCKED UP and I WANT TO BE A YANK

 Canadian punk band Fucked Up covered Cardboard  Brains “I Want To Be A Yank” from the 1977 White EP. A version of their cover is on CBC Music. Here is the original:

A New Day Has Dawned

I like the idea of reinventing oneself. Having lived in the depths of despair and adversity for so long, I need to believe that I can break free of my affliction and bondage and to prosper. There is a flickering light in my very soul that says I can despite my age and infirmities embrace happiness, health and self actualisation.

A New Day Has Dawned. I just like the sound of it.

I feel sick today. I don’t know what it is but there is an uneasiness in my gut. In conjunction my mind was in the turmoil that has haunted me for at least twenty years. Perhaps optimism is a delusion, but I relentlessly pursue happiness. Not to say that I achieve it, but nevertheless I hunger for and pursue it.

Murder Mayhem Madness. An audacious title and I chuckle inside at the reaction it gets, but nevertheless it holds true as an apt title of my tentative memoirs. It’s sensational but true.

Killer Rats is a film that I did in Bulgaria with Ron Perlman.

(2001)

Okay. I worked for International X-ray Company limited from at least 1969 to 2002. And I did a lot of other things. I am best known as lead singer of my band Cardboard Brains and being award winning recording artist of the album “The Life of Ermie Scub”. So lets get into that.

Here’s my discography:

Cardboard Brains “The White EP” 1977 (Brainco Worldwide)

Cardboard Brains “The Last Pogo” 1978 (BOMB records)

Cardboard Brains “The Black EP” 1979 (Guilt Records)

John Paul Young  “The Life of Ermie Scub” 1980 (Canadian Media Development Company) LP 

John Paul Young “Out Time Escapes”/“Fire Incensed As In Rage” 7 inch 1980.

John Paul Young and Cardboard Brains “Live at The Edge” (CMDC)1981 LP

John Paul Young and Cardboard Brains Compilation CD with added track “World Within a Dream” 1998. (MEG Entertainment).

Cardboard Brains “The White EP” fan re-issue ?

Awards:

1982 CASBY Award winner, Most Promising Recording Artist.

 So I continue to blog. So far its been therapeutic. My spirits are up and that’s a good thing. You would be amazed at what I can accomplish when I feel good.

One of the highlights of my career was backing up one of my favourite bands of all time: The Stranglers. It was during the Feline tour. I thought I would be crucified at Barrymore’s in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada. I had witnessed supporting acts suffer an unruly audience waiting for The Stranglers, and I had heard stories. As lead singer I was always the focal point of aggression and I thought I would be intimidated. But it was great.

And it was just three of us. Vince Carlucci on guitar and synth, Pauline Groen on synth bass and PolyMoog and me out front on vocals. And no drummer just a LinnDrum. We actually received an encore. Or two, I don’t recall.